I vowed as the start of 2020 that silence would not be my response, as it had been many times before to avoid conflict and disappointing others. I sacrificed myself almost every time and realized my joy and my soul was at stake.

I didn’t realize of course that this declaration to myself would kick off a year that would include a pandemic that changed the world as we know it, and a reckoning with injustice and an acknowledgement of racism in our country.

I discovered that initiating courageous conversations on situations that matter to me is the starting point. Now that’s harder that it looks on paper, I had to move past every worse case scenario that my mind could come up with!

After initiating several of those conversations recently, I was reminded that fear is “false evidence appearing real.” None of the worse case scenarios happened – not one. Not only did each conversation result in a positive outcome for me – it profoundly helped other people.

It does matter how I approached these conversations and the relationships that provided the foundation and psychological safety to have them.

“Voting for me” doesn’t mean you don’t vote for others – or sacrifice for the greater good – it means that your voice is heard and what you need and want matters.

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