How you view a situation depends on where you sit and what you see.   It makes all the difference when you recognize that circumstances are often connected to a bigger plan and purpose.  It may be the sensitivity and mindfulness that comes with experiencing loss that reminds me of that truth.

I attended a viewing for Beau Biden, former attorney general for the state of Delaware and son of Vice President, Joseph R. Biden, Jr.  The wait was a minimum of 3 1/2 hours, but that wait was connected to paying tribute to someone who spent countless hours, days, and years serving our country and our state.    I recognized there was a reverence – even in the waiting – how we moved in line (I estimate at least 500 people at the time), the quiet tone of our voices, and the courtesy we showed to one another.  I also recognized the Biden Family made a conscious and considerate decision to allow the public to be included in the services, and had spent countless hours greeting each and every person that day and at the capital the day before.  Our wait seemed so insignificant in light of the loss and sacrifice that as made by the family.

I attended a home going service for my Great Aunt recently and the service, according to the custom and tradition of her faith, was high spirited and at one point was a challenge for me to follow.  I then realized it was more about what the family needed.  I began to watch them more closely and I realized that they were very much in tune to the pastor’s message and I imagined my Aunt raising her voice in unison, as she had been for more than 60 years as a member of that congregation.

I then attended a memorial service for my Uncle who was a well known entrepreneur across the city since the mid 1950’s.  My Dad attended with me to honor his brother-in-law and to represent my mom who passed away in 2011.  I often take my Dad to these services – I’ve learned it’s very important to his generation to show their respect. During the eulogy, the Pastor reflected on how much of a sharp dresser my Uncle was and his smooth confidence.  The Pastor recognized the role that my Uncle’s Alma Mater played in his high standards for dress and appearance, and the example our young men need to see.  All the men in attendance from his Alma Mater were asked to stand and be recognized – my Dad was one of them.  I realized that I was there to do two things – honor my uncle and connect my Dad to his history.

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